What Exactly Is… Narcissism?

In Greek mythology, there was once this young Greek man named Narcissus. One day, he saw his own reflection in a pool of water and he immediately fell in love with it. He kept looking at his own reflection until he drowned and soon enough, a flower named "narcissus" started growing right in that place. Narcissism is a personality/behavior disorder where you put yourself and your needs above others; it’s when one is described as “self-centered” and they are excessively obsessed with themselves, whether it be looks, skills, etc. You might have heard of the word “narcissism” being thrown around, but it is usually not used to describe someone who has the actual and often dangerous disorder.

What are some traits of narcissists?
The main trait of narcissists is always wanting attention and they want to feel the most important or superior around others. They are very self-entitled, believing that they deserve special admiration because they are just so “great”. They believe that they are the best in every aspect, no matter what others tell them, and they want everyone to know that. For example, you are working on a group project with someone who keeps trying to take over and do everything because they think that they are the best and that they have the skills to do everything. That is when you know you might be dealing with a person with NPD, narcissistic personality disorder. Narcissists also feel entitled to using others to get what they want. A big disadvantage for narcissists is that their relationships with friends, family, co-workers, etc. are usually harmed since they usually have a lack of consideration for others because they only think about making themselves look better; this makes being around people with NPD very difficult and suffocating. When they don’t get the special treatment they think they deserve, they also get very frustrated easily and extremely angry, especially when someone else gets all the attention.

What is narcissism caused by?
Currently, there’s really no definite cause as to how narcissists come about. However, researchers speculate that how narcissists were raised as children plays a big role. Children that were abused when they were younger tend to grow up ashamed of their true self and in certain situations, they would respond with a fake personality, a narcissistic personality. Not only this but children whose parents endlessly praised them grow up very used to the special attention and therefore, they would expect special treatment from others.

Now, the next time you hear the word “narcissism” or “narcissist”, you know what it actually means!